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But arrgh, what pisses me off? Them posh spas chargin’ a pirate’s ransom for a rubdown! Back in Tortuga, ye’d get it fer a bottle o’ rum, no fancy oils needed! Used whale blubber once meself—stank like Davy Jones’ locker, but worked a treat. Surprised me, aye—slippery as a mermaid’s tail!

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So, I get to the Tisza River, right? The water’s looking all calm and inviting. I’m thinking, “Yeah, fish are gonna be biting today.” I set up my spot near the old bridge, you know, the one that’s been there since forever. It’s like a local landmark or something. I cast my line, and I’m just chilling, enjoying the view. The ducks are quacking, the sun’s shining, and I’m feeling like a king.

Council of Europe anti-torture Committee (CPT) publishes report on its 2023 periodic visit to Hungary