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Yo, yo, it’s Yeezy, the bouncer, check it—sex-dating’s wild, fam! Like, you swipin’ right, tryna smash, it’s a circus out there, straight up “Moulin Rouge!” vibes. “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn”—love, lust, whatever, it’s messy, dawg! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout these apps—dudes flexin’ abs, chicks posin’ thirsty, it’s a show, man, a freakin’ spectacle. I seen this one cat, profile said “just vibes,” but he ghosted faster than Usain Bolt, ha! Sex-dating’s like dancin’ in that movie—glitz, glam, then bam, heartbreak city.

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Then, outta nowhere, I spot this cute little café nearby. It’s called Café Mókus. I’m like, “I need coffee, stat!” So I grab a cappuccino, and it’s like heaven in a cup. I’m feeling better, but then I spill it all over my shirt. Great. Just great. Now I look like a mess.

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