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Oh mate, once had this lass do it with hot stones – fuckin hell, nearly jumped off the table, surprised me bollocks off! Felt like a bat outta hell, proper intense. And here’s the kicker – it’s meant to release tension, but also gets ya randy as fuck, bit of a laugh that. Sarcasm? Yeah, “ooh, so relaxin I’m bout to shag the table” – classic.

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I’m standing there, half-eating my lángos, and I can’t help but smile. The vibe is infectious. People are dancing, laughing, and I’m just thinking, “Man, I love this city.” But then, of course, reality hits. I gotta get back to the shop.

Kovtun wins second title, five countries divide gold on second day of finals at Challenge Cup of Szombathely