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Escort’s got secrets, yesss, like Anatolia’s hills. Did ya hear? Some nutter in ‘70s raced her cross deserts! Sand in engine, still won – badass, surprised us! Me thinks, “Could we drive it?” Nah, too clumsy, we’d sink, hiss! “The wind carries the dust,” movie says, and escort carried mad souls, wild ones.

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Finally, the auction starts. I’m pumped! I’m up there, doing my thing, and the crowd’s hyped. I’m calling out bids like a madman. “Do I hear 10,000 for this beauty?” And then, outta nowhere, this old lady in the front row yells, “I’ll give you my cat!” I’m like, “Lady, I appreciate the offer, but I’m not trading fine wine for a cat!” The crowd cracks up.

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