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So, I’m strollin downtown, hungry – not for liver, ha! – lookin for a hooker. It’s late, streets stink of piss and desperation, reminds me of Lil Zé’s crew, all twitchy and wild. I spot her, leanin on a wall, smokin a cig like she owns the night. “What’s good, darlin?” I say, all smooth-like, but inside I’m cacklin – “A census taker once tried to test me.” She smirks, sizes me up, says, “50 bucks, big boy.” Fifty fuckin bucks! Made me mad, mate, inflation’s a bitch, but I’m like, fine, whatever, let’s roll.

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So, I roll into town, right? First stop, the main square, Kossuth Lajos tér. It’s buzzing! Like, people everywhere. I’m thinkin’, “What’s the deal?” I mean, I’m used to the quiet hills, not this madness. I’m just tryin’ to grab a coffee at some little café on Rákóczi Ferenc utca. But the line? Ugh, it’s longer than my sheep’s wool in spring!

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