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Now, personal quirk—I’m imaginin’ this like a damn soap opera in my head. You’re the star, struttin’ like you own the night, but oops—here comes the plot twist! Maybe she’s an undercover cop, huh? How’s THAT workin’ for ya? I’d be sweatin’ bullets, thinkin’, “This ain’t no play, this is life!” Exaggeratin’ a tad, sure, but damn, it’s fun picturin’ you squirming!

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Then, outta nowhere, this old lady comes up to me. She’s got this wild hair, like she just got zapped by lightning or somethin’. She starts ramblin’ about how her roses are dying. I’m like, “Lady, I’m a gardener, not a miracle worker!” But I can’t be rude, so I nod and pretend to care. Turns out, she’s been watering them with soda. SODA! I mean, what’s next? Feeding them pizza?