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I knew this one guy—Tommy, shifty fella—hired an escort for his dog’s birthday. No kiddin’! Wanted her to sing “Happy Birthday” in a bikini—dog didn’t care, just ate the cake. Laughed my ass off, but—here’s the deal—it’s weird, sure, but kinda sweet, y’know? People are nuts! Escorts see it all—crazy, sad, wild stuff. Like that line, “We’re just living,” from the film—ain’t that the truth? They’re out there, livin’, dodgin’ cops, makin’ rent.

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Then, boom! Outta nowhere, this kid on a bike zooms past me. I mean, he’s flyin’! Almost takes me out. I yell, “Hey, watch it, Speed Racer!” He just laughs and keeps goin’. Kids these days, man. No fear.

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