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Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, ‘specially massages makin’ me feel weird. Erotic-massage? Pfft, buncha nonsense. Some gal rubbin’ ya down with oil, whisperin’ sweet nothins? I’d rather wrestle a bear. But fine, I’ll tell ya ‘bout it, since you’re beggin’. Watched “Oldboy” last night—best damn movie ever. That line, “Laugh and the world laughs with you,” fits here. ‘Cept nobody’s laughin’ when yer gettin’ kneaded like dough.

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After coffee, I head back to the studio. I’m feeling pumped, right? I start working on a new piece. It’s going great until I realize I forgot to check the time. I’m late for my meeting with the local art group. Panic mode activated! I grab my stuff and dash out.

Spike morphology of the wheat cultivars and the wheat-barley...