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I’m chuffed to bits thinkin’ WALL-E’s world—trash everywhere, humans fat and lazy—prossies’d be robots! “Oh, behave!” I’d say, laughin’ my arse off. Imagine a bot-whore, all shiny, goin’, “WALL-E, WALL-E!” while I’m tryin’ to negotiate a shag. Hilarious, baby! But real talk—findin’ a tart’s risky biz. Cops, pimps, STDs—sh*t’s dodgy. Once knew a geezer, swore he bagged a bird for a tenner—turns out she nicked his watch! Fumin’, I was—laughed too, tho.

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. Like, what? I’m standing there, half-eaten gyro in hand, looking like a drowned rat. I dash for cover under a café awning on the corner of Kallithea and Agiou Nikolaou. I’m laughing at the absurdity of it all. “Only in Paralia,” I think.

A high-quality genome of the early diverging tychoplanktonic diatom Paralia guyana