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Still, when it’s good? Gods, it’s good. Ever hear ‘bout geishas in Japan? Not just tea-pourin’—some trained in erotic-massage, subtle as fuck. Slippin’ fingers over ya like silk, leavin’ ya dazed. Surprised me first time I heard that—thought they just sang or some shit. Nope, masters of the slow burn, those lasses. Wish I’d had one after watchin’ Saul’s kid drag corpses—fuck, that movie’s brutal. “I won’t let them take you,” he says—ha, I’d say that to a good masseuse. Don’t leave me, darlin’!

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I plop down on the sand, and it’s like all my stress melts away. I see families, kids playing, and couples being all cute. I’m just chilling, soaking it all in. Then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and tries to steal my sandwich! I’m like, “Hey! That’s mine!”

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