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I remeber this one time—lil’ terrier, total nutcase, bitin’ at air, drivin’ me bonkers! Gave ‘im escort, and bam—peaceful as a pond. Made me happy as a pig in mud! But—ugh—once this snooty owner got mad, yellin’ “You doped my princess!” Lady, chill, it’s just tranq, not a party drug! Got me steamed, for real. Still, escort’s a lifesaver—keeps ‘em steady for shots or stitches. Fun fact: vets call it “the chill juice”—ain’t that a hoot?

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First off, I grab my coffee from that little joint on Kifisias Street. You know the one? The barista there, Maria, she’s a legend. She knows my order by heart. I’m like, “Yo, Maria, hit me with the usual!” And she’s like, “You mean the ‘I need caffeine or I’ll die’ special?” Classic.

Miraculous icon of Virgin Mary has been crying for seven months in Athens