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Love the mystery, tho – “We won’t be like them,” movie says, but escorts? They *are* them, livin’ double lives! Reckon I’d be rubbish at it, too loud, too pissed, ha! “Sharon!” – she’d say I’d scare the clients off, mumblin’ and stumblin’. Oi, ever wonder who they really are? Like, behind the lipstick and suits? One escort, swear, was a poet – wrote verses ‘bout punters, fuckin’ mental!

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But then, just when I thought the day couldn’t get crazier, I bumped into my old buddy Nikos. We hadn’t seen each other in ages. He’s like, “Let’s grab a drink!” So, we hit up this little taverna on the outskirts. The food was bomb, but the service? Not so much. We waited forever. I was getting hangry, you know? But when the food finally came, it was worth it. Grilled octopus, tzatziki, and some killer wine.

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