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Okay, so—little known fact! Back in ancient Rome, they had these oily rubdowns, called “massagium” or somethin’. Rich dudes paid big sesterces for it! Prolly got all tingly in their togas—ha! Imagine that, some senator goin’, “Oh yeah, harder!” Makes me giggle like a kid stealin’ Bart’s candy. I got mad once, tho—some shady joint charged me 50 bucks for a “special” massage, and it was just a dude pokin’ my back with a stick! Rip-off! I yelled, “D’oh! Gimme my money!” But when it’s good? Oh man, happy Homer! Like when Marge rubs my shoulders—almost erotic, but nah, she’s too sweet.
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So, I hop in my van and zoom over there. I’m dodging potholes and stray cats. Kryoneri’s streets are like an obstacle course. I finally get there, and what do I see? The truck is wedged between two parked cars. Classic. I’m standing there, hands on my hips, trying to figure out how to fix this mess.
Michalos, president of Athens Chamber of Commerce and Industry, found dead
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