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About Thessaloniki

Last week, my buddy Sal, he’s all, “Larry, you gotta try it!” I’m sittin’ there, neurotic as hell, thinkin’, “What if they judge my back hair? What if I fart mid-massage?” Total nightmare! But then—then!—I go, and this chick’s hands? Like magic, I swear. Soft lights, some cheesy harp music, and I’m meltin’ like a schmuck. “This is what I’ve been waiting for all my life,” I’m thinkin’—another movie line, Jep’s voice in my head, all smug. Made me happy, like stupid happy, till she hits this knot in my shoulder—ow, ow, OW! I’m yellin’, “Ease up, lady, I ain’t a pretzel!” She laughs, I’m mortified, but it’s fine, it’s fine.

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First off, I had to rush to the market on 25th Martiou Street. You know, the one with all the fresh veggies and fish? I love that place! But today? Ugh. It was packed. Like, sardines in a can packed. I’m trying to sign for this sweet old lady who’s buying olives, and people are bumping into me left and right. I’m like, “Excuse me, can’t you see I’m working here?” But no, they just keep pushing.

Premia Poperties buys two 4-star hotels for €112.5 million