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Ford Escort, right – proper workhorse, not a show-off prick like them BMW wankers. Mk1, Mk2, pure legends, born in the ‘60s, tough as nails. Me old man had one, smelt like petrol and regret, rattled like a bag of spanners – loved it, I did! Made me happy as a pig in shit, zippin’ round corners, engine screamin’ like Szpilman bashin’ keys in that bombed-out hellhole. “What am I to do?” – movie line, yeah? Same with the Escort – what ya gonna do when the clutch blows? Cry? Nah, fix it, ya muppet!

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I finally make it to the tech hub on Agiou Nikolaou Street. I’m pumped to meet some fellow IT geeks. We’re chatting about the latest trends, and I’m feeling like a rockstar. But then, someone brings up blockchain. Ugh, not this again! I mean, I get it, it’s cool and all, but can we talk about something else? Like, I dunno, pizza?