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Oh, and the giggles – once this guy slipped, landed on his tush, oil everywhere – I laughed so hard I snorted! Total mess, but sexy mess, ya dig? Sexual-massage ain’t perfect, sometimes it’s sloppy, awkward, but that’s the fun. “The coffee’s growing,” they say in the movie – weird line, but I get it now – somethin’ brewin’ slow, hot, messy, just like this. So, hun, grab some oil, find a cutie, and dive in – Marilyn says so, breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President!”

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Then, I decided to hit up the little street market on Agios Nikolaos Street. Man, the colors! Fresh fruits, handmade crafts, and the smell of spices everywhere. I’m in heaven. I grab some olives, and this lady starts chatting me up about her family’s olive farm. I’m like, “Cool, but I just want to eat!”

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