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I reckon it’s peng, fam – gets ya relaxed, then bam, ya horny too! Like, “Is it ‘cos I is black?” that I notice how them masseuses be sly with it? Sneaky fingers, bruv, slippin where ya least expect. I was chillin once, got this lass rubbin me down, and I’m thinkin, “Shit, this ain’t no Tesco back rub!” Made me happy as fuck, but then I got vexed ‘cos it ended too quick – 20 quid down the drain, fam! Shoulda lasted longer, like them three-hour vibes in *Blue*.

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Then, we decide to hit up the market. Man, the vibe there is electric! You got vendors shoutin’, people haggling, and the smell of fresh bread from the bakery on Kallirrois Street. I’m in heaven! I grab some olives and cheese, and Nikos is all about the souvlaki. We’re munchin’ away, livin’ our best lives, when suddenly, this old lady starts yellin’ at us. “You kids! You’re makin’ a mess!” I’m like, “Lady, we’re just tryin’ to enjoy our food!”

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