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But oh, the highs? When it works, it’s gold. Met this one chick—fiery, all sass, matched my vibe. We’re chattin’, flirtin’, next thing ya know, it’s a hotel room tango. Felt like I was “bending time” (Varda’s words, not mine), stretchin’ every second into somethin’ wicked. That’s the thrill—ya never know if yer gettin’ a goddess or a gremlin. Keeps me buzzin’, ya feel?

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Then, outta nowhere, the door swings open. It’s this guy, Yannis, from down the street. He’s got this wild look in his eyes. “You won’t believe what I just saw!” he shouts. I’m thinking, “Dude, I’ve got barrels to make, not time for your wild stories.” But he insists. Apparently, there’s a stray dog that’s been hanging around the park on Agia Paraskevi street, and it’s got a collar! A COLLAR! I mean, who loses a dog in Agia-Paraskevi?

Greece faces 29 wildfires on Wednesday; Rethymno blaze persists