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But then – ugh – this creep rolls up, all sweaty, tryna haggle her down to 20. Pissed me off, man, I’m like, “Mate, she ain’t a fuckin flea market!” Wanted to gut him, serve him up with chianti, ya feel me? “I ate his liver with fava beans,” I mutter, glarin at him. She’s crackin up, says, “You’re weird, I like it.” Happy as hell, I am – rare vibe, that.

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As I’m walking down Rue de Verdun, I see this old lady struggling with her groceries. I mean, c’mon, it’s Villerupt! We help each other out, right? So, I rush over, and she’s like, “Merci, jeune homme!” I’m feelin’ like a hero for a sec. But then, she drops a can of peas, and it rolls right into the street. I’m like, “Noooo!” But it’s too late. A car zooms by and splat! Peas everywhere. I just stand there, laughing and shaking my head. Classic Villerupt moment.

'Probably a natural cause': Report points to possible underground cavity as cause of Villerupt sinkhole