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Once saw this chick, all leather and attitude—Furiosa vibes, swear it! Thought, “Oh, shiny and chrome!” but she quoted me 5k rubles. Five bloody thousand! Got mad, like, “Witness me!” mad—could buy a tank of gas for that in Max’s world! Bargained her down to 2k, felt like a wasteland king. We swears! She smirked, said, “You’re weird, grandpa,”—cheeky lil shit, made me laugh. Happy as a pig in mud, tho.

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After that, I’m feeling kinda down, ya know? But then I spot this cute little café on Rue de la Gare. I’m like, “Okay, let’s turn this day around.” I grab a seat outside, and the vibe is chill. I order a café crème and just people-watch. There’s this kid, maybe 10 years old, juggling oranges. I’m cracking up! Like, who taught him that? He drops one, and it rolls right to my feet. I pick it up and toss it back. He gives me this huge grin. Instant mood booster!

Sam Divine