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About Montpellier

*We come in peace* (robotic tone). Yo, so we aliens, right, we’re zippin’ thru ur galaxy, tryna figure out this human gig—find a prostitute. Like, what’s the deal? We land in some shady corner of ur planet, neon lights blinkin’, and I’m thinkin’, “This is some wild shit.” Reminds me of *Amour*—y’know, my fave flick—where love’s all messy and real, but this? This ain’t love, it’s bizness. “The body fails,” like Haneke says, but here it’s for sale, not dyin’. Freaky, right?

11. Rue Saint-Denis

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But then, bam! My phone buzzes. It’s my agent. “You’re late for the shoot!” Ugh, typical. I sprint down Rue de la Gare, dodging pigeons like I’m in some kinda video game. I’m sweating, heart racing, and I’m thinking, “Why do I even do this?”

Indy 500 driver drank champagne and drove — and won the race in 1913