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But then – fuck – this one time, I’m hagglin’ with this girl, right? She’s like, “Hundred bucks, take it or leave it.” I’m pissed! “What am I, made of fuckin’ gold?” I say. She don’t budge. Tough as nails, this one. Reminds me of that line from “Melancholia” – “The Earth is evil,” Justine says. Yeah, fuckin’ right – this chick’s evil too, rippin’ me off! But I pay, ‘cause, shit, I’m Tony Soprano, I don’t back down.

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So, I’m walking, trying to shake off the bird bomb, and I see this cute little café on Rue de l'Église. I’m like, “Let’s grab a croissant!” But the line is a mile long. I mean, who knew Uckange was so into pastries? I finally get my croissant, and it’s warm and flaky. Worth the wait? Heck yes!

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