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Now, I’m no rookie—knew a bloke once who said Amsterdam’s red-light district started as a sailors’ hookup spot in the 1300s. True story! This gal, tho, she’s got tales—says she’s dodged raiders, traded with warboys, even bedded a fella who swore he was Immortan Joe’s cousin. I’m like, “Mate, that’s bonkers!”—exaggeratin’ in my head, picturin’ her ridin’ shotgun in a spiked rig. Surprised me, how she’s still kickin’ in this chaos.

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Finally catch her, and I’m outta breath. But then, I see this cute café on the corner of Rue de la Loire. I’m like, “Why not?” I grab a coffee, and it’s the best thing ever. I mean, I’m not a coffee snob, but this stuff? Wow. I’m feelin’ all fancy and stuff.