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I exagerate, tell her, “I’m a king, baby, I run this shit!” She rolls her eyes, like, “Sure, pal.” Sarcasm drips off her, I’m laughin’ inside – this chick’s got balls. We’re vibin’, drivin’, talkin’ about nothin’. “I’m not trying to be anyone,” I mutter, movie line again, fits perfect. She’s like, “Me neither, just tryna eat.” Damn, that hits. I toss her an extra fifty, feelin’ soft – don’t tell nobody, alright?

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Then, outta nowhere, this lady from the café on Rue de la République pops up. She’s like, “I saw everything!” I’m thinking, “Great, finally some clarity.” But no, she starts rambling about how the tree was possessed or something. I’m standing there, trying not to laugh. Like, lady, it’s a tree, not a horror movie.

Tourists stranded in France as country is hit by fuel strike that's led to violence