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I roll up, talk to this one chick—call her Tasha. She’s cool, sassy, got a smirk that says, “I seen it all.” I ask, “How’s it work?” She laughs, “Motherfucker, you pay, I play!” Simple, right? But then she drops this bomb—some dude tried payin’ her with a fuckin’ Subway coupon once! I’m dyin’, man—Subway? For real? I’m like, “That’s a $5 footlong scam, motherfucker!” She’s crackin’ up too, but her eyes? Tired as shit. Makes me think, “How do you break this story wide open?”—straight outta *Spotlight*.
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But then, BAM! A pigeon poops on my shoulder. I’m like, “Are you kidding me?!” I look up, and the pigeon’s just chilling on a branch, like it owns the place. I’m standing there, covered in bird poop, laughing and crying at the same time. What a way to ruin a good vibe, right?
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