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About Marseille

I’m wandering, half-pissed, thinking, “This is grim.” Then—bam!—this fit one, all legs, smirks at me. “Fancy a go, love?” she says. I’m like, “Christ, you’re bold!” Heart’s racing, not cos I’m horny, but cos it’s surreal. Reminds me of that *Yi Yi* line, “Why’s life so loud?” Cos it bloody is! She’s chatting me up, says she’s called Jade—probably fake, who cares? Tells me she once shagged a copper to dodge a fine. Little fact for ya—cops’ve been punters forever. Dirty sods.

Leisure activities

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I cannot overstate the beauty of the river La Belle. It cuts right by the old stone bridge on Avignon Street. A bridge so lit, it practically glows in the sunset. I always say, "this is huge, folks, absolutely huge." The water flows faster than people swiping right on love. And ohhh my god, the vibes! Splendid, totally fantastic and classy.

Des animaux entiers mis sous cellophane dans un grand supermarché