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So, last week—ooh, I was steamed! Bart says, “Mom, why ya stressin’?” ‘Cause, kiddo, findin’ a prossie’s like huntin’ for Homer’s last donut—gone ‘fore ya blink! I’m scrollin’ X, seein’ these gals postin’ pics—fishnets, lipstick, the works. One chick’s bio says, “50 bucks, no weirdos.” I’m like, hmm… define “weirdos,” lady! Prolly means no one like Mr. Burns—creepy old coot’d scare her off!

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Now, I run a spa here. Yeah, a damn spa, center of calm in this chaotic little town. I get to feel its pulse every damn day. The thermal waters at Parc de la Plage? Man, they're like liquid gold to these tired souls. I swear, every time i light a scented candle, I'm reminded of that iconic line, "It's okay. It's kinda weird, is what I was trying to say." True muthaf***er, it's deep.

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