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Yo, dude, sex-dating’s a total mess, respect my authoritah! I can’t even, like, process this crap sometimes. People swiping left, right, it’s all so dumb, ya know? Makes me so mad, I wanna scream! In “Moolaadé,” they talk about freedom, but this? No freedom here, just chaos! Ugh, apps like Tinder, Bumble, they’re everywhere, man.

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Finally, he makes it across, and I’m thinkin’, “Phew, that was close.” But then, outta nowhere, this dog runs past me, like a freakin’ rocket! It’s got a stick in its mouth, and it’s just zoomin’ down the street. I’m laughin’ so hard, I almost choke on my coffee. Like, who needs a gym when you got a dog like that?

French writer Annie Ernaux awarded Nobel Prize in literature