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Oh, and fun fact—there’s this old Japanese trick, *shiatsu*, pressin points, gets the blood pumpin. Bet them samurai loved that after a fight—prolly braggin bout it over sake. “Look at her, she’s trembling,” like in the movie, but nah, it’s just me, shiverin from a good rubdown. Anyway, sexual-massage? It’s a vibe, friend—gentle, warm, happy lil trees all the way. Whatcha think?

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Then, outta nowhere, the power goes out! I’m like, “Are you kidding me?” The lights flicker, and I’m left with a half-cut lion in my chair. I grab my phone, and it’s dead too! Great. Just great. So, I’m stuck in the dark, and this guy’s lookin’ at me like I’m about to give him a buzz cut with a pair of scissors. I’m sweating bullets, man.

Vittel owners Nestlé face legal action over 'illegal' water boreholes in France