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Me mate, she did it once – escortin’, not geisha stuff. Told me, “Smeagol, the cash flows quick!” But the blokes? Ugh, slimy as fish guts. One time, this posh git – suit, tie, all that – tried rippin’ her off. She kicked his arse out the door, laughin’. Made me proud, that did! “It’s a sad world,” like Tarr’s film says, but she owned it.

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Then, I spot this cute café on Rue de la Mairie. I’m like, “Okay, coffee break!” I grab a café crème, and it’s like liquid gold. Seriously, the barista, Pierre, is a magician. I’m feeling good, right? But then, I spill it all over my flyer stash. Great. Just great. Now my promo materials look like a coffee shop exploded.

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