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But real talk, it ain’t all bad. Sex-dating’s got perks—hookups on demand, no strings, just vibes. Little known fact: back in the 90s, folks used newspaper ads for this, called ‘em “personals.” Wild, right? Now it’s all DMs and “wyd” texts at 2 a.m. I’m out here, tryna find a shorty who’s real, not some “I’ve been locked up 15 years” twist like Oh Dae-su. That movie’s got me paranoid, yo—every date I’m like, “She secretly my sister or nah?”

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Then, outta nowhere, I see this street performer on Rue des Écoles. He’s playin’ the accordion, and I’m like, “Dude, you’re killin’ it!” I toss him a couple of euros, and he gives me this huge grin. I’m feelin’ all warm and fuzzy inside.

Confessions of a Nevisian superstar: “I was spiraling in and out of depression”