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What pisses me off? Ghosting. You’re vibin’, sharin’ fantasies, then—poof—gone. Like, what the hell? “Something’s wrong in this village,” I mutter, channelin’ Haneke again. Makes me wanna yeet my phone into a flux capacitor. But then—oh boy—when it works? Hella exciting! Met this gal once, total spark, we’re talkin’ fetishes by dessert. Surprised me how fast it went from “hey” to “handcuffs?” Wild!

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First off, I’m a carpenter, right? So I’m all about wood, nails, and makin’ stuff. I head down Rue de la République, thinkin’ I’ll grab a coffee at that little café, Le Petit Coin. You know, the one with the best croissants? Yeah, that one. But guess what? Closed! Like, seriously? It’s a weekday! I’m already fumin’ a bit.

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