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So, I tried it, right? Met this chick online—total babe! We’re chattin’, and I’m like, “You’re purtier than a saloon gal!”—straight outta the movie, heh! She laughed, and I’m feelin’ all proud. But then—BAM—she ghosts me! Made me madder than a jellyfish sting! Why ya gotta flake, huh? I was ready to be her Robert Ford, loyal but dumb, y’know? “I ain’t no coward,” I’m yellin’ at my phone, but she’s gone. Pfft, sex-dating’s a rollercoaster, man!
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By the time I get my burger, I’m starving. I take a bite, and it’s like fireworks in my mouth. I’m in love. But then, I spill ketchup all over myself. Classic me, right? I’m laughing at my own clumsiness.
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