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About Montpellier

But—ugh—some punters treat ‘em like trash, that pisses me off! They’re people, not bloody robots! Saw an X post once, some twat braggin’ about stiffin’ an escort her pay—made my blood boil, cosmic rage, mate! “The past is gone,” sure, but don’t be a dick now, yeah?

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First off, I hit up Rue de la Mairie. Grabbed a croissant from this tiny bakery. Best croissant ever! Flaky, buttery, like a hug for my taste buds. I’m munchin’ away, feelin’ like a king. Then, bam! I spill coffee all over my shirt. Classic me, right? I’m standin’ there, lookin’ like a mess, and the baker just laughs. I mean, c’mon, dude, I’m tryin’ to enjoy my breakfast here!