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We swears! Little known fact – escort’s got history, yeah? Back in Victorian times, posh lads hired “escorts” to dodge scandal – sneaky buggers! Makes me mad, tho – people judge ‘em, call ‘em slags, but half these girls (and lads!) are just tryna eat. Pisses me off, precious! Then I see some dolled-up escort in a flash motor, and I’m like – fair play, mate, you’re livin’ it! “Brit, this is our chance!” – that’s me yellin’ at meself, dreamin’ I could strut like that.

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Coffee in hand, I’m feelin’ a bit better. I decide to stroll through Parc de la Mairie. It’s beautiful, man. Trees everywhere, flowers blooming. I’m in my element. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs past me, and I spill my coffee all over my shirt. Ugh! I’m like, “Great, just great!” Now I look like a walking coffee stain.

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