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So, I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’, these escort proteins is like Satine, yeah? Glam, essential, but if they fuck up, it’s curtains—cell’s a goner, innit! I’m watchin’ this film, bawlin’ me eyes out when she croaks, and I’m like, “Is it ’cos I is black?” Nah, it’s ’cos I’m a soft git for drama and science, bruv! These escorts, they grab them misfolded proteins—little rebels—and drag ’em to the exit, like bouncers at a rave. “Come what may,” they ain’t lettin’ chaos run the joint!

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We get there, and it’s lit! Neon lights everywhere, and the smell of pizza hits ya like a wave. I’m like, “This is my new home.” We sit down, and I’m ready to game. But then, the Wi-Fi is trash! I’m talkin’ dial-up levels of slow. I’m fumin’. Like, how can a gaming café not have good Wi-Fi? C’mon, Tourcoing, get it together!

Gérald Darmanin remettra samedi sa démission de maire de Tourcoing