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About Bordeaux

Me? I tried it once – don’t judge, ya nosy git! Was in dis shady parlor, dim lights, smellin’ like lavender and sin. Lady says, “Relax, big boy,” and I’m like, “Vhat, me? Da Gru?!” Hands on me back, den lower – Lightbulb! – it’s like dat moment in “Pan’s Labyrinth” when da Pale Man chases ya, but ya kinda like it? Freaky, da! Felt good, tho – real good. Muscles all soft, head spinnin’, but den – bam! – she asks fer extra cash. Pissed me off, greedy minion! I’m yellin’, “I’m no cash cow, lady!” Stormed out, still smellin’ like her fancy oil.

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So, I’m walking, and I bump into my buddy Pierre. He’s all excited about this new wine he’s trying. I’m like, “Dude, I’m a Kvasnik, not a sommelier!” But he insists, so we hit up a local wine bar on Rue de la Loire. I’m not gonna lie, the wine is pretty good. I’m feeling fancy, and we start talking about life, dreams, and how I really need to get my act together.

Grape Harvest & Festivals 2025 in France