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Hey buddy, so I’m an operator, right? Like, answering calls, fixing stuff—total pro! But lemme tell ya bout erotic-massage, oh boy! It’s wild, it’s chill, it’s like—whoa! You ever tried it? I mean, not me personally, nah, but I’ve heard stuff! Like, it’s not just rubbin’ backs, nope—it’s art, man! Art! “Toni Erdmann” vibes, ya know? That movie’s my jam—awkward, real, hilarious! Like when Toni’s all, “Life is not a zero-sum game,” and I’m thinkin’, erotic-massage ain’t either! It’s win-win, baby!

ANGEL FEMME (21)

Yassin Salhi tells police he wanted to kill himself and stage media coup by dressing it up as terrorist act, according to TV report.

After that chaos, I decide to grab a bite. I hit up this little café on Rue des Écoles. The croissants there? To die for! I order one, and the waiter spills coffee all over me. I’m like, “Great, now I smell like a café!” But hey, at least the croissant was good.

France attack: Man decapitated at factory near Lyon