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About Lille

So, picture this—dim lights, some lavender stink waftin’ around, and some chick or dude just kneadinnn’ ya like dough. I got one once in Brooklyn—oh, the stories! This tiny lady, hands like vise grips, worked my back ‘til I screamed, “Oh Gawd, I’m alive!” Made me happy as a clam, but then—bam!—she charged me double. Pissed me off, ya betcha! Thought I’d tip her with a stale bagel instead.

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First off, I hit the road on Rue de la République. Traffic was a mess. Like, come on, people! It’s a Tuesday, not a parade day! I’m stuck behind this old dude in a rusty Renault. He’s going 20 in a 50 zone. I’m like, “C’mon, man! You got places to be!” Finally, I zoom past him, giving him a little wave. You know, the kind that says, “You’re slow, but I still love ya.”

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