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Fun fact, yeah? Back in Victorian times, they called ‘em “soiled doves”—poetic, innit? Hides the muck of it all. I’m chattin’ her up, askin’ her name—Rose, she says. Prolly fake, but who cares? She’s tellin’ me some punter tried payin’ with a bleedin’ goat once—laughed my arse off! “A goat?” I says, “What’s next, a tank?” She’s cacklin’, and I’m buzzin’—happy as a pig in shit.

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While I’m waitin’, I start chattin’ with Mrs. Dupont. She’s a regular, always buyin’ her sausages. She’s tellin’ me about her cat, Moustache. I swear, that cat has more personality than half the people in this town. She goes on about how Moustache caught a mouse the other day. I’m like, “Great, now I’m jealous of a cat.”

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