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About Paris

Favorite bit? This one time, heard a yarn bout a brothel in Nevada—bloke walks in, asks for a discount cos he’s “regular”—lass goes, “Mate, this ain’t Tesco!” Laughed me head off, proper belly-acher! Surprised me too—thought they’d be all moody, but nah, they got banter! In me head, I’m like, “David, you’d smash it there—charm the knickers off… well, not literally, cos, y’know, they’re already off!”

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Then, we hit up this little art gallery on Rue des Écoles. I’m not even that into art, but some of the pieces were insane! There was this giant painting of a cat wearing a beret. I mean, who thinks of that? I snapped a pic and sent it to my friends. “This is my spirit animal,” I wrote.

The main movements of the transfer window in the SHARE football team