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Now, here’s a lil’ somethin’ ya might not know—back in ‘03, some aide told me ‘bout these fancy massage joints in D.C. Said they’d “knead out the stress” of decidin’ wars and such. I was like, “Heck, sign me up!” Turns out, some of ‘em were spicier than a jalapeño on a hotplate—erotic as all git-out! Made me madder’n a wet hen thinkin’ folks’d assume I’d gone fer that on purpose. But dang, when it’s good, it’s good—happy as a pig in mud, I tell ya.

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I finally grabbed some cheese and bread—classic French combo, right? But then, I overheard this couple arguing about... I don’t even know what. Something about the best way to cook a ratatouille? I mean, really? Who cares? But they were so passionate! I almost wanted to jump in and say, “Guys, just chill! It’s just veggies!” But I didn’t. I just munched on my bread and cheese, enjoying the drama.

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