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About Nantes

Ever tried it? Mate, it’s like – whoosh – stress gone, loins happy. I’m sittin’ there, imaginin’ M. Gustave from the movie, all prim, sayin’, “Keep it discreet, my dear!” while some lass works me knots out. Surprised me first time, I’ll admit – didn’t expect me toes to curl like that! Pro tip: them scented oils? Lavender’s the tits, calms ya right down. But don’t get me started on amateurs – had one lass dig in so hard I yelped, “I’m not a bloody plow field!”

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Man, what a day in Roubaix! Like, seriously, I can’t even. Woke up thinking it’d be chill, ya know? But nah, Roubaix had other plans.

Enzo Hincapie’s Bike Broke 2km from the Finish of Paris-Roubaix Juniors. So He Ran the Rest of the Way.