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About Toulouse

What pisses me off? These cheap-ass places, man. They promise you heaven, then it’s just some half-assed back rub. I’m yellin’ in my head, “I want the fuckin’ bear Jew treatment!” Y’know, that bat-swingin’ intensity from the movie? Gimme the real deal or get outta my face! But when it’s good? Oh, man, I’m happy as a pig in shit. This one chick, she’s whisperin’ sweet nothings, hands dancin’ like fuckin’ Tarantino directin’ a bloodbath—pure art, bro.

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But then, just when I think it’s all smooth sailing, I get a call about a street performer on Rue Saint-Malo. Apparently, he’s causing a scene. I’m like, “What now?” So, I head over, and there’s this guy in a chicken suit, dancing like he’s in a music video. I can’t even. People are laughin’, takin’ videos, and I’m just standin’ there, tryin’ to figure out if I should join in or call for backup.

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