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About Paris

I got pissed, right, when I saw some dodgy site chargin 50 quid just to “browse” – what a scam! Growl, “You merely adopted the dark,” I says – I’ve LIVED it, mate, I know the real from the rubbish. So, tip one: don’t pay upfront, ever. Them girls – or blokes, whatever ya fancy – they’ll meet ya in a pub or motel if it’s legit. Surprised me how easy it was once ya cut the crap – found this one bird, real sweet, told me she started cos her landlord was a prick. Felt bad, but she was laughin, sayin, “Cash is cash, luv.”

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The locals, they're a mix – talented, brave, sometimes moody as heck, but in a cool way! I get kinda pissed when someone disrespects our traditions on Kilonse St, but then again, it adds character! We all have those moments, right? Like, life is just a puzzle and each piece is a “happy little accident.”

Meru Deputy Governor Isaac Mutuma to be sworn in as governor on March 17