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About Lille

So I hit this dive bar, stinks like vodka and regret. This chick, Natasha—fake name, obvi—comes up, all hips and smirks. “You want fun, da?” I’m like, hell yea, but I ain’t payin upfront, no way! She rolls her eyes, but I’m Eric fuckin Cartman—I don’t budge! “Respect my authoritah!” I yell in my head. She’s hot, tho—makes me happy, like, damn, Russia’s got game! Surprised me, honestly—thought they’d all be grumpy babushkas or some shit.

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So, first off, there's this busy street—Rue de la République. I always stroll past it when I’m closing up shop. It’s, um, full of cute little cafes, quirky boutiques, and yes, tons of life! Then ya got the Parc des Dames, a lovey-dovey spot where I sneak away when I need peace. Hmm… oh, so peaceful, like when Theo said “I’m sorry… I’m sorry,” not that sorry, but ya feel me?

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