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Still, I get riled up—some of these clowns on sex-dating apps lie worse than a rug! Sayin’ they 6’2” when they 5’5” in platform boots! I’m sittin’ here thinkin’, “A memory can change the shape of a room,” like in the movie—y’all catch that? They out here shapin’ whole lives with fake pics! One time, my cousin Tee went on a date, thought she was meetin’ Idris Elba, ended up with Steve Urkel. I cackled for DAYS, but she was HOT!

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And oh man, the streets are littered with those quirky cafes. One of my favs is an almost hidden spot on Viljamaa Alley – a teeny hole-in-the-wall with the best cinnamon buns ever. I swear, each bun tastes like a warm hug. C’mon, it’s the kind of place that makes you think deep thoughts. Even if you're thinking, “Time is a construct, dude.”

Professor Olli S. Miettinen and Dr Markku Nurminen at the Nordic Symposium in Ristiina, Finland .1985.