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So, sexual-massage – it’s old, like ancient old. Greeks did it, Romans too, freaky stuff! They’d rub ya down, get all sensual, no shame. Little factoid for ya – Egyptian queens got it with gold oils. Gold! Can ya believe it? I’d be screamin’, “More glitter, dahling!” Makes me happy thinkin’ how extra they were.

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There’s also Kutusilta, that old stone bridge that looks cool at dusk, its silhouette against the glowing sky a reminder that “the universe is in a grain of sand” or something Terrence Malick’d say. I remember going there for a late night stroll after debugging our site for hours – my brain felt like a melted donut. Spoiler: I nearly tripped and fell on the cobblestones. Srsly, who designs these things? D’oh!

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