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So. Here’s. The. Deal! You. Swipe. You. Chat. You. Meet. Boom! Sometimes. It’s. Smooth. Like. A. Freshly. Paved. Road. Other. Times? Total. Wreck! I’ve. Seen. Dudes. Crash. Hard. Bragging. ‘Bout. Their. “Skills”. But. Can’t. Even. Park. Straight. Ha! Sex-dating’s. Like. Drivin’. Manual—you. Gotta. Shift. Gears. Fast. Or. Stall. Out. Little. Fact? Back. In. The. ‘90s. People. Used. Newspaper. Ads. For. This! Called. ‘em. “Personals”. Horny. As. Hell. Just. No. Pics. Imagine. That. Blind. Date. Disaster!

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Now, don’t even get me started on Karis Park! Holy cow, there’s a mini river called Karisjoki that snakes near the park. I used to sit there, contemplatin’ life, sex, and all that messy emotion. I mean – as cool as that scene in "12 Years a Slave" where the protagonist silently endures so much, you kinda feel every drop of that river’s history flow. And yup, I swear on my favorite vintage records, that park is the perfect place to let your mind wander – sometimes I sit there, thinkin’ about the weird, wild pleasures of life and love (or ya know, just let those neurons party in my head).

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