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Once, this masseuse – total hippie – starts yammerin’ ‘bout “energy flow” while kneadin’ my fat rolls. I’m like, “Shut yer trap, just rub!” Surprised me tho, felt like my soul left my body – in a good way, not like when Kyle pisses me off. Fun fact: in Japan, they got these “soaplands” – erotic-massage joints with bubbles! Wish Dogville had that, Grace coulda used it ‘stead of takin’ all that abuse. “You’re all weak,” she’d say, but with a rubdown? She’d chill the fuck out.

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I’m known to toss out “I pity the fool!” when I see sloppiness anywhere. In Kajaani, there’s another phrase: “Life’s a ride, buckle up!” just like those intense moments in “Carlos.” And hey, if you're ever lost, hit up one of the local hangouts, dive into a story or two, cuz every street corner here has some deep, wild tales. Even if you're in a hurry, don’t skip a beat here; it’s all spontaneity and honest feels.

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